Steve McClaren

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November 11, 2008

Five conclusions: England 2-2 Czech Republic

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Czech stalemate 1. Fabio Capello needs to stop the rot quickly before he turns into Steve McClaren. Expectations are high, but he has made a few key promises about what he expects from the team which he has not yet delivered on. Click to continue reading...

Steve McClaren's fake Dutch accent is back... woohoo!

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"We need to go in relaxsched, we need to go in with also belief." What? Steve McClaren's fake Dutch accent is on the go again. This guy is such a plonker. The accent is bad enough (there are loads of annoying people who accidentally imitate the accents of those they talk to), but to start rearranging your syntax. Click to continue reading...

October 29, 2008

Steve McClaren Doesn’t Learn

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Remember how we laughed at Steve McClaren and his weird decision to speak to Dutch interviewers as if English were his second language? Well, he's still doing it. If you want to emulate Steve McClaren, The Spoiler has a checklist of how it's done. Even better, Steve's FC Twente goalkeeper Sander Boshker has decided to emulate [. Click to continue reading...

October 28, 2008

Just in case you thought all the piss-taking had got through to Steve McClaren…

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... it hasn't This interview was from last week's action. When will he ever learn. At least he manages to slip-in the English cliche: "Anything can happen in football." Click to continue reading...

October 21, 2008

Steve McClaren is a Tactical Genius (Sort of)

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Steve McClaren's FC Twente were 0-0 with Heracles with ten minutes to go. But then McClaren pulled out some managerial magic. Go to the 5:55 mark on the clip and you'll see him scream something at the top of his lungs a la Mel Gibson in Braveheart. And it worked. Because just a few seconds later [... Click to continue reading...

October 7, 2008

UEFA Cup Group Draw

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UEFA held the draw for the UEFA Cup group stage today and some fascinating pairings emerged. Both Martin Jol and Steve McClaren will take their new clubs back to England as FC Twente will face Manchester City and Jol's Hamburg will take on Aston Villa. This year's groups are looking really tough and the field contains [. Click to continue reading...

September 25, 2008

Terry Venables would be mad to take the Newcastle job

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When you have Terry Venables' wealth of experience and expertise as a coach, you can pick and choose your jobs a little more freely than most people. Perhaps he is eager to get back into the game after leaving the England set-up with Steve McClaren, and maybe he is looking for a real challenge to [.. Click to continue reading...

September 21, 2008

Report That Venables Rejects Newcastle Advances

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The People is reporting this morning that Terry Venables has turned down the manager's job at Newcastle United. Terry Venables - praying while assistant to England's Steve McClaren Venables was reportedly made an offer by owner Mike Ashley but refused the opportunity to end his five-year absence from management. Click to continue reading...

September 18, 2008

Eschewing the Transfer Market for an All-World Coaching Staff

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If your beloved club was to be bought out by an bajillionaire, would it be better to spend insane transfer fees on a number of players or bring in a coaching staff that could make the West Ham reserves play like Milan's Dream Team of the late 80's and early 90's. So why not build [...] Click to continue reading...

September 12, 2008

England Have Renewed Hope after Croatia Crushing

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It may only be one victory but England's comprehensive beating of Croatia on Wednesday night could represent a dramatic turn in fortunes for the famous footballers who for so long have failed miserably to live up to their nations' expectations. Not quite good enough under Sven Goran Eriksson, an absolute shambles under Steve McClaren, and now [. Click to continue reading...

September 11, 2008

New QPR Players Ostensibly Decided by Committee

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Paul Warburton/London Informer - Choices are us
Sep 11 2008 By Paul Warburton, London Informer


It wouldn't do for Kevin Keegan - but new QPR players are now chosen by committee - with boss Iain Dowie a mere third of the decision making.
In a week when former Fulham boss Keegan quit Newcastle over his right to decide on new players, Dowie accepts co-owner Flavio Briatore and sporting director Gianni Paladini will continue to set the agenda in strengthening Rs' squad. Click to continue reading...

Walcott Dazzles As England Dismantles Croatia

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Croatia had never lost an international game at home prior to yesterday's qualifier against England. The last time England had come to Maksimir Stadium, they were trounced 2-0 due to Steve McClaren's tinkering with a new formation. Fabio Capello decided to employ a standard 4-4-2 against Croatia yesterday and the only thing he tinkered with was [. Click to continue reading...

September 7, 2008

Capello angry with Rooney and Cole but happy with the performance

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Apparently Fabio Capello 'vented his anger' at Joe Cole and Wayne Rooney after England's laboured 2-0 win against Azerbaijan in their World Cup qualifier yesterday. He said that he was pleased with the team and that the performance was a good confidence booster ahead of the far sterner test in Croatia on Wednesday. Click to continue reading...

September 5, 2008

Gareth Barry: Liverpool Summer Transfer Saga Hit Me Hard

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Gareth Barry goes into England's World Cup qualifying campaign admitting he lost his focus over the summer.

The midfielder was at the centre of a bitter £18million tug-of-war between Aston Villa and Liverpool which became the summer's longest-running transfer saga.

It even led to England boss Fabio Capello admitting he was concerned at Barry's drop in form during last month's friendly with the Czech Republic at Wembley. Click to continue reading...

September 3, 2008

Liverpool's Jamie Carragher 'Would Rather Miss For England'

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Jamie Carragher says defeat while playing for England, even in the World Cup, hurt less than a loss with Liverpool.

Carragher turned his back on international football last year after being constantly overlooked by then manager Steve McClaren.

The 30-year-old won 34 caps, the last of which saw him miss a penalty as England went out of the 2006 World Cup against Portugal in a shootout. Click to continue reading...

August 29, 2008

Kljestan to FC Twente?

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Ives has a little gossip on the Dutch club interested in our man Sacha.  Apparently it's none of than Steve McClaren's FC Twente, who just crashed out of Champions League qualifying earlier this week to Arsenal. Ives reports: "...the Chivas USA midfielder could join former England manager Steve McClaren at Twente if the Dutch club can [. Click to continue reading...

Dutch Club Eying Kljestan?

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I mentioned yesterday that it wouldn't take long before we hear Sacha Kljestan's name being mentioned by several European clubs for a transfer move. Today we get a report that Dutch club FC Twente is interested in the Chivas USA midfielder. He could join former England boss Steve McClaren at Twente if they can make an [. Click to continue reading...

Afternoon Ticker: Twente eyeing Kljestan, Benfica signs Suazo and Milner to Villa

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Photo by ISIphotos.com

Plenty of moving and shaking going on in the transfer market today, though sadly there are no completed deals to report on the Americans in the mix just yet.

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UEFA Cup First Round Draw Result

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The UEFA Cup first-round draw was held on Friday and there are a number of interesting new faces in the competition. One of those teams is Dutch side FC Twente, who as we've detailed in previous posts, is now coached by former England boss Steve McClaren. Twente, who were entered into the UEFA Cup after [. Click to continue reading...

Weekend TV Preview 29-31 August

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Friday 29 August

19.30 Karlsruher SC v FC Koln, Bundesliga, Setanta Sports 1
The home side were robbed at Hamburg last week and will be keen to make amends against new boys Koln who have had an uncertain start to the season. Should be a cracking atmosphere at the Wildparkstadion.

19. Click to continue reading...

August 28, 2008

Liverpool Dodge The Bullet Whilst Arsenal Cruise

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I don't know whether you have noticed but since the arrival of Rafa Benítez at Anfield, Liverpool have tended to do things in dramatic style, some would say "the hard way", whilst playing in the Champions League.  There have been too many of those "special Anfield nights" to mention here, but let's just say this [. Click to continue reading...

August 27, 2008

Daily Dose 08.27.08

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Something to read while your bank changes your password... Rapids leave their mark on Bryan Namoff (Behind the Badge) C-Ron to Real move back on? (Marca) Old Firm debut for Edu? (Rangers Offside) Shteve von McKlaijren's Dutch accshent ish back (101 Great Goals) Philly's MLS stadium, take a look (Yanks Soccer) Welcome back to Europe Old Lady (mCalcio) Senderos joins the rossoneri [. Click to continue reading...

Arsenal 4-0 FC Twente - Match Report

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  This was billed as a routine game for Arsenal and so it turned out.  Fabregas' first appearance of the season coincided with Arsenal's most fluent and attacking performance of te season and a 4-0 rout of Steve McClaren's FC Twente. Arsenal knocked the ball around without threatening, until the 28th minute when Nasri picked the ball [. Click to continue reading...

Match Report: Arsenal 4-0 FC Twente

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Arsenal bounced back from last weekends Premier League defeat to Fulham with a superb win over Steve McClaren's FC Twente. Nicklas Bendtner started ahead of below-par Emmanuel Adebayor while Kolo Toure was dropped to the bench mainly thanks to Johan Djourou's previous performances in the side. Arsenal Starting XI Almunia Sagna - Djourou - Gallas - Clichy Walcott - [. Click to continue reading...

Foolish FC Twente coach defends Dutch accent ahead of Arsenal match

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If you haven't yet seen Steve McClaren speaking with a remarkable Dutch accent, then you're missing out. The FC Twente coach has wasted no time trying to endear himself to the people of the Netherlands by adopting the accent of Martin Jol in interviews with TV stations in Holland. The ... Click to continue reading...

August 25, 2008

The case for Stewart Downing

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After the drudgery of two awful premiership performances in a row, it is clear that Liverpool need to sign at least one dedicated winger before the transfer deadline. Stewart Downing is once again in the frame but it seems that many fans just don't want him. However, in my view, Downing could be just the player Liverpool need to bring some much needed balance to the team. Click to continue reading...

August 24, 2008

Terry Venables's QPR Return?...Davide Succi's Brace

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Sunday Mirror/Steve Stammers - Terry Venables set to make return to Queens Park Rangers
Terry Venables is in line for a sensational return to football with Queens Park Rangers.
Venables has been out of the game for 10 months after losing his job as the assistant to Steve McClaren when the England manager was sacked. Click to continue reading...

August 21, 2008

Versatile Gerrard Is Left In The Lurch Yet Again

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From link man to left midfielder, they will find a way to squeeze Steven Gerrard into this England team somehow.

They shoehorn the Liverpool midfielder into the side and encourage him to slide up and down the greasy pole that has become England's left midfield. Poor blighter.

Too good to leave out and too flexible to hold down his own position, he was stationed out there again last night. Click to continue reading...

August 20, 2008

Capello Lost As England Boss

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England manager Fabio Capello  must have been channeling the" Wally With The Brolly" aka Steve McClaren. That can be the only logical answer for his decisions this week. First of all the decision to name John Terry as England captain was the wrong one. Terry is a great club captain. He rallies the troops and is [. Click to continue reading...

August 19, 2008

Afternoon Ticker: Terry retains England captaincy, City takes out a loan and EPL transfer watch

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Photo by ISIphotos.com

Good afternoon folks. If you are at work trying to catch up on everything you were supposed to be doing when you were watching Argentina-Brazil, don't worry. We will catch you up on some of the other news in the soccer world.

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The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

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The Good Brazilians in London: Yeah yeah, Portsmouth ain't exactly on their level, but Big Boss is going to be mighty pleased this season with Luiz & Deco running the show at Stamford Bridge. See, money can buy happiness. HSV: Hamburger just lost their most bestest player and quite possibly the finest WAG in the Bundesliga, only [. Click to continue reading...

August 17, 2008

How the Dutch sabotaged England’s Euro dreams

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An astonishing leaked interview with former England boss Steve "Umbrella" McClaren has made it clear to British football authorities that the man they entrusted with England's dismal Euro 2008 qualifying campaign was in fact a Dutch spy, sent in to sabotage English football. The interview (shown below) is thought to have been taken when McClaren was [. Click to continue reading...

August 15, 2008

McClown forgets everything about England, even his accent

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Just when I thought my respect for Steve McClaren couldn't get any lower he goes and gives the most bizarre interview ever to a Dutch TV channel.... For some reason he decided to speak to the commentator in a broken English accent! I can only think two things have happened here; either McClaren has started to lose his grasp of English after only being in Holland for 8 weeks or he believed the interviewer so stupid that he decided to mimic their broken English accent. Click to continue reading...

Steve McClaren’s Ridiculous Fake Dutch Accent

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his confirms what we all knew.... This is quite possibly the most hilarious interview we've ever seen, cries of what a **** can be heard all across the land. What exactly is he doing? His fake Dutch accent puts Joss Stone's fake American one to shame, what a complete knob. Click to continue reading...

Why Is Steve McClaren Speaking English In a Dutch Accent?

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..... and 'how do you say it.... Underdog?' eh???

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