south america

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November 20, 2008

Eurosport celebrates England’s defeat to Argentina last night

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Hang on a minute... In the coverage that we saw last night, England beat Germany in Berlin. But in the parallel universe in which Eurosport exists the Three Lions were once again slain by Diego Maradona. A Eurosport hack who got a bit caught up in the Terry Butcher furore decided to write that Argentina had [. Click to continue reading...

November 18, 2008

The Football Riot That Stopped a Season

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There are football riots that stop a game, and then there are football riots that stop a whole season. The riot that followed Danubio'a 1-0 over Nacional in Uruguay's Primera División was one of the latter. At the final whistle fans from both teams invaded the pitch and fought for a full fifteen minutes (video [. Click to continue reading...

The curious clauses of Diego Maradona’s contract

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A inside look at the document signed by the Hand of God... ...Clause 2. Paragraph 3. Section 2. Mr Maradona will be captioned at all times... Click to continue reading...

November 14, 2008

Ronaldo’s Doppelgänger Gets A Job In Porn

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Even better, Ronaldo's doppelgänger - basically some chunky bloke grew some chin fuzz and a quasi-afro - his real name unknown as of yet, got to perform in this adult video with one of Ronaldo's classiest ex-girlfriends, Vivi Brunieri, whose CV also includes very WAGtastic things such as wearing very little clothing while flipping her [. Click to continue reading...

November 13, 2008

Hard tackle: Taison cuddles up to team-mate during flight

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Brazilian player stops short of joining the Mile High Club Dull news report about football team travelling on plane. Probably telling you when Internacional are expecting to arrive at their destination, when they are next training and... woah! Hang on a minute! Was that player snuggling up to his team-mate for an in-flight nap? Click to continue reading...

November 10, 2008

Pitch Riots & Bolivian Beatdowns

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Traveling to the sort of "fringe countries" in terms of South American football (read: those not named Argentina or Brazil) almost always proves to be an exercise in believing the unbelievable. Today's example: Bolivia. A top flight game between Wilstermann and Aurora turned out to be a top flight cage match between Aurora and riot [. Click to continue reading...

Brazilian TV’s Great WAG-Off

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So this is what it all comes down to. Forget the ball, the players, the meaningless games, Brazil has taken it to the level we've all been waiting for: Which team has the hottest fan? (Using the term "fan" loosely. Lots of ladies can be found kissing the badge of their respective teams, but not [...] Click to continue reading...

November 6, 2008

Football video: Brazilian defender sent-off for grabbing yellow card

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I see your yellow card, and I raise you red Botafogo's Andre Luis was red-carded in the Copa Sudamericana match with Estudiantes after snatching the yellow card from the referee's hand. He then flashes it around a bit before screwing it up and putting it back into the ref's hand. He promptly receives a red card [. Click to continue reading...

More Proof That Referees Don’t Like Being Yellow Carded By Players

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Botafogo defender André Luís disagreed with the referee Carlos Chandía's decision to book him in last night's Copa Sudamericana quarterfinal versus Estudiantes, and registered his disapproval by snatching the yellow card and showing it back to the ref. Unfortunately for Luis, it doesn't work like that. Click to continue reading...

October 27, 2008

Corinthians Back in Serie A

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Big news in Brazil this week: Corinthians are back in the top flight. Or at least they will be next season after securing promotion with this 2-0 win over Ceara at home with goals from Douglas and Chicao. How Corinthians found themselves down in Serie B is pretty depressing tale of business meets football. Click to continue reading...

October 24, 2008

Sergio ‘Kun’ Aguero - singing star

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Atletico Madrid striker's venture into the music biz This is quite an old video, but it has escaped my attention thus far so I am guessing it might be a similar story for others. This is Atletico Madrid and Argentina's Kun Aguero teaming up with compatriots Los Leales for a bit of a singsong. Click to continue reading...

October 23, 2008

Copa Sudamericana Explained (Sort of)

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It was the first leg of the Copa Sudamericana quarterfinals last night, and we have all the goals/match reports on Copa Sudamericana Offside. You've probably heard the Copa Sud referred to as "South America's UEFA Cup." That's sort of true, but also sort of wrong. Below is an explanation from someone who only recently tried to get [. Click to continue reading...

October 22, 2008

Football videos: Brazilian goalkeeper thinks he is left-back. He’s not

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Keeping clanger from South America Was it not the great philosopher Ruud Gullit who once said: "Goalkeepers are goalkeepers because they can't play football"? The proof is in the pudding, so here is the goalkeeper of Brazilian Série B side Gama passing the ball out of defence last week. Spotted on The Offside Click to continue reading...

This is Why Goalkeepers Hate YouTube

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Horrible, horrible, horrible goalkeeping mistake in Campeonato Brasileiro Série B this past weekend. For some reason the Gama keeper thought he was playing left back, from there played the ball straight to an Avaí player, who knew a free gift when he saw it and curled it into the far corner of the empty net. Click to continue reading...

October 20, 2008

Boca Takes Superclasico With 10

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A crippling victory for Boca at the hands of their bitter rivals, as they took a 1-0 win at El Monumental, with the lone goal coming just 8 minutes after being relegated to 10 men. Juan Roman Riquelme's free kick found the head of young'un Lucas Viatri, who looped one up and over, into the [...] Click to continue reading...

October 18, 2008

Hard tackle: Carlos Alberto banned for eight matches for stroking opponent’s backside

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Pull your finger out, lad! Werder Bremen midfielder Carlos Alberto, currently on-loan at Brazilian outfit Botafogo, has picked up an eight-match ban for this loving caress of a Gremio player's rump. Quite why he decided to run his finger the length of an opponent's crack is up for debate, but the Brazilian authorities have deemed it [. Click to continue reading...

October 17, 2008

Carlos Alberto Banned For A Little Slap & Tickle

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Well, at least the slap, and it looks like a little tickle is attempted, making it as good a theory as any. Carlos Alberto, enfant terrible for Werder Bremen currently on loan to Botafogo, was banned eight games (8!) for inappropriate activities with an opponent's bottom. And not "I'm going to teach you a lesson" [. Click to continue reading...

World Cup 2010 Round-up: October 2010

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It's been another busy week of World Cup 2010 qualifiers so let's round up all the important information from around the globe, starting off with...

Africa

...and here we have exciting news about the climax to Round 2 and the teams that have battled through to win a place in the last round. Click to continue reading...

October 16, 2008

Football video: Argentinian club president threatens to kill his players

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Proof that relegation is bad for your health Rosario Central president Horacio Usandizaga is not likely to win any Boss of the Year awards after he was secretly filmed making a speech in which he threatened to kill his club's players and coaching staff. The under-fire president came out with guns blazing (hopefully not too literally) as [. Click to continue reading...

October 15, 2008

Rosario Central President Horacio Usandizaga Threatens to Kill All His Players

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Sometimes footballers need a little extra motivation. Goal bonuses, win bonuses, that sort of thing. Just a little carrot to dangle in front of their noses to make them reach that extra bit harder. Argentina's Rosario Central are a team in need of such motivation, as the once great club currently occupies one of the [. Click to continue reading...

Hard Tackle: Colombia stretch each other’s groins

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South American nation's favourite bit of training How does your country's top players prepare for an international match? If you're Colombian, the answer is by standing between their team-mates legs and looking down longingly. Judge for yourself just how much Camilo Zuniga enjoys this exercise after the jump. Click to continue reading...

October 4, 2008

The Dribbly Magic of Franco Zuculini

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Racing beat Rosario Central 4-1 in the Argentinean Apertura last night, with Franco Zuculini crafting an absolute gem for the first goal. When the teenage midfielder receives the ball, it looks like he's got nowhere to go. And when he starts dribbling in circles it looks like he's going nowhere. But after turning this way and [. Click to continue reading...

October 2, 2008

Photo: Who Needs Nights Under European Lights?

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When South America lights will provide a similar mystique but an even better photo op. (AP Photo/Natacha Pisarenko) Click to continue reading...

September 25, 2008

Fatty Vasco de Gama Players Face Fines

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Vasco de Gama are in trouble. The usually pretty successful club (they've won a Brazilian championship in every decade since the '70s, and the Copa Libertadores in 1998) are currently in the bottom four of the Campeonato Brasileiro Série A, so if the season ended right now they'd be relegated to Série B. Click to continue reading...

Match-Fixing in Football - can we trust the game 100%?

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The well known match fixing scandals of the past in Italy and South America have rocked world football over the years. The allegations made against Bruce Grobbelaar and others a few years ago in England forced the officials and fans in that country to assess their own game. As fans, we need to know that the [. Click to continue reading...

September 23, 2008

Diego Maradona to Inter Milan

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From the land of the strange comes this article where Inter Milan are reportedly going to hire Diego Maradona as a consultant and scout in South America. What exactly is he supposed to do - go around South America watching matches and making player recommendations to Inter? It makes no sense and seems like it just is a grab at publicity. Click to continue reading...

Future Now

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It was League Cup day in England and Scotland, but halfway across the world, Boca Juniors also fielded a side largely made up of youngsters in a second-rate knockout competition. In this case it was the Copa Sudamericana, and the opposition were the champions of South America - recent Copa Libertadores winners Liga de Quito. Click to continue reading...

Tim Vickery in South America

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Premier League puts South America in the Shade Click to continue reading...

September 21, 2008

Two sides fighting for the title

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River Plate and Boca Juniors. Undisputably, the two biggest clubs in Argentine football. River, the defending champions in the league. Boca, six times champions of South America, most recently just last year. On Sunday, both were playing much smaller teams. River hadn't ever lost away to new promoted San Martín, and returned to Tucumán 15 [. Click to continue reading...

World Cup 2010 Round-up

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We know it's been a week or two since the most recent round of World Cup qualifiers took place, but we never quite got round to summing up all the action from outside Europe, so here's our whistle-stop tour of all you need to know, starting with...

South America
It seems we were a little hasty to cast our judgement on Brazil after the September 6th/7th matches. Click to continue reading...

September 18, 2008

Paraguayans KO Ref With Rock

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At the 1:11 mark you can see fans of Paraguayan side Olimpia, unhappy that their team is losing to Universidad Católica of Chile in the Copa Sudamericana, start pelting the field with objects in the 85th minute and knock the assistant referee, Jorge Calderon, seemingly unconscious. It caused cuts and, according to Babelfish, "cerebral commotion" [. Click to continue reading...

INCOMING (?): Toronto FC looking for a Canadian DP next season

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According to CBC News (click here for the full and original article), Mo Johnston at TFC was in South America looking at four young players (age 19-21). However, he stated the DP would not be South American. He is looking for one from Canada.

Begin the guessing now...

Courtesy of:
-The Patrician Click to continue reading...

September 16, 2008

Tough at the top for Basile and Dunga

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Starting this month, I'm writing for ESPN's Soccernet on football across South America. These articles won't always include Argentine football, of course, but when they do I'll let you know here. This week the subject under the microscope is why the pressure of managing one of the world's top international sides is being cranked up [. Click to continue reading...

September 11, 2008

Anti-climactic

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So the United States, Mexico and Costa Rica are all on nine points after three qualifiers apiece. Each nation is pretty much through to the Hexagonal, though I haven't done the math. Maybe they are in for sure, don't know.

And while it's a great accomplishment for each nation to be 3-0 at this point, it's not exactly surprising. Click to continue reading...

September 9, 2008

World Cup 2010 Update: South America

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As you'll by now be aware, last weekend was a busy time where the 2010 World Cup qualifiers were concerned. On Sunday we told you about the latest action in Europe - today we fill you in with the major happenings from South America.

And the big news here is that Brazil are back on the war path again. Click to continue reading...
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