Awhile back, Daryl wrote about "Football Superstars," the upcoming interactive video game, where you and nine other real people (everybody but goalkeeper) take the field together. With mandatory practice you can work your way up to league play and beyond. Now it's apparently time to take it to the next level. Click to continue reading...

The English tabloids pride themselves on having the 'pulse' of the nation. In truth, they are opportunists, shamelessly using exaggeration and false morality to paint themselves as whiter than white (NOTW 'undercover' agents investigating prostitutes and drug dealers always cracks me up). Sometimes they step over the line, as NOTW have done several times in the [. Click to continue reading...

Now, Cristiano Ronaldo has never quite been the person to settle down with a lovely sweet girl. No, the Manchester United ace is more like a playboy who flirts and beds models and supermodels. But prostitutes!? Well, seems like the love-lorn Portuguese winger is now embracing prostitutes and drug-dealers as his . Click to continue reading...

As good as Manchester United were last year, and they were very good, their off the field shenanigans, mostly those involving Portuguese speaking attackers and their hooker-a-thons, left something to be desired. Not exactly getting off to a shining start in the department this year either because Anderson had a drug dealing buddy of his [. Click to continue reading...

In case you haven't heard, there's this guy called Usain Bolt who is quite a fast runner. The 22-year-old Jamaican won three gold medals at the recent Olympics and also smashed three world records in the process, so how does he plan to celebrate? Life-size gold statue of himself? A sexual obstacle course of prostitutes? Click to continue reading...

Despite sporting a very classy new tattoo sleeve on his left arm, Craig Bellamy is still an unpleasant piece of work; it's cute that he wants to be as street as D. Beck, but ultimately he's just a shit. This week then the West Ham striker continued on his mission to alienate as many people in the UK as humanly possible, after getting involved in a row with Ipswich fans as he was substituted at Monday night's game. Click to continue reading...

This guy is like the Pac-Man Jones of the Premiership.

The latest is that the West Hammer verbally abused a female Ipswich Town fan during a friendly match recently.

"With him being an ex-Norwich player I shouted 'see you later Bellamy' and he just turned around and swore at me and he said something about prostitutes in Ipswich.

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PREMIER League chief executive Richard Scudamore has reacted angrily to suggestions that he was the mysterious Witness E in the Max Mosley nothing-to-do-with-Nazi's sex orgy trial. F1 boss Mr Mosley was accused earlier this year of participating in a Nazi sex orgy with five prostitutes by the ever-reliable News of the World. Click to continue reading...

As with every summer, a few names have dominated the headlines and transitioned from transfer story to full on midday soap opera. You've got The Ronaldo Who Can At Least Get Prostitutes' Genders Correct, Krispy Kreme's new spokesman Ronaldinho, and another guy who is no stranger to tasty snacks, Frank Lampard. Click to continue reading...

A couple of weeks ago now we ran a piece about an Austrian brewery offering any Austrian player who scored in the Euro a lifetime supply of free beer. Congratulations then to Ivica Vastic, I hope you are absolutely wasted right this second. We also (jokingly) suggested that we were but a stones throw away from players being offered prostitutes and the like as performance incentives too. Click to continue reading...

Football star and prophesier Cristiano Ronaldo announced his future moves, today. During the 30-minute interview session, the famous number seven was candid and controversial about his future.

"I will perform many stepovers in the next few days – mostly over wine bottles and sleeping supermodels.

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Wayne Rooney is officially off the singles market after marrying long-time sweetheart Coleen McLoughlin in a 17th-century villa on the Italian Riviera last Friday, news that is sure to break the hearts of the various prostitutes whom Rooney used while the couple was still dating.

His good friend and England teammate, Steven Gerrard, was not present at the wedding as he and his wife (who, by the way, is considerably more attractive than McLoughlin) were celebrating their one-year anniversary in Miami over the weekend. Click to continue reading...

Rarely does a soccer headline grace the front page of the ESPN website. In this case, Brazilian World Cup star Ronaldo (not Cristiano) made the front page after a run in with some transvestite hookers in a Rio Di Janeiro hotel. Ronaldo brought two prostitutes to his hotel ...

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I have been a bit distressed this week to see my rolling news board on this page has been filled with stories of Steve Wright.

The trial of the man accused of killing five prostitutes began on Monday and every news department in the country appears to have moved into Ipswich. Click to continue reading...