It should come as no surprise that when I finally received my December issue of 'FourFourTwo' rating the mag's top 100 players in the world, there was nary an American to be seen. I'd wager a safe bet that aside from Aston Villa keeper Brad Freidel there wasn't a Yank within sniffing distance. Maybe that will change when Landon Donovan sets the Bundesliga on fire with his receding hairline, Click to continue reading...

(Not that Christian Slater NBC show.) Liverpool and Chelsea. Chelsea and Liverpool. Thought it seems like this is the 4,210th time the two storied English clubs have played in the last four years, it's only the 20th time since the 2004-05 season, including in the Champions League each season. Is it as tedious as 'Freddy v. Click to continue reading...

Short preamble to picks today. Very short. In fact here it is. Click on this link to the Guardian featuring readers photo-shopping the entire Newcastle boondoggle. At this point what else is there to do for fans of Newcastle? The team you live-and-die with is in the hands of borderline morons out to make a buck. Click to continue reading...

Second acts are always tough. For every great sequel -- think 'The Empire Strikes Back' -- there are countless second offerings that, although okay, pale in comparison to the originals -- 'Die Hard 2', 'Predator 2', 'Wayne's World 2' etc. I have no idea what Cristiano Ronaldo's favorite movie is. I'd guess it's a close tie between 'The Fast and the Furious' or 'Finding Nemo'. Click to continue reading...

No lengthy preamble today, aside from it's fun to watch the England national team continue to struggle. Good times. Also, gotta love ESPN2 scheduling the Galaxy/Fire match Thursday night, barely 24 hours after said England friendly, hence a certain Beckham fellow (and Landon Donovan) couldn't play. Maybe television will finally get MLS to honor FIFA dates. Click to continue reading...

Print this out and save for May to let me know what a clueless jackass your humble writer is. (Sorry guys this post was accidentally scheduled to publish on Saturday, oops.) 20. Stoke City -- Anyone got a good Harry Potters pun at the ready? 19. Hull City -- In Windass we trust. 18. Fulham -- I know Brian McBride and Andy Johnson, you're no Brian McBride. Click to continue reading...

It's potty time again So with only 19 days to go till the start of the new season, overpaid primadonnas all over the country are packing their family's up and moving to the other end of this glorious land, and placing their orders for their new Mazzeratti's with leather trim and 25″ alloys..... Click to continue reading...

"I'm a weed in Hitler's bunker!" -- George Costanza Earlier in this season I used that quote from Costanza's meltdown at Play Now Sports to describe Wigan Athletic. That's probably unfair. The Latics are more of second-rate dictator, a Chiang Kai-shek, as it were. No, today we'll use the allusion for everyone's least favorite world football superpower -- Chelsea. Click to continue reading...

Couple odds and ends: * MLS goes to Philly. Cue the Rocky music. It's hard to find any downside here. It creates a nice Northeastern corridor with DC, Philly, New Jersey and New England, so away fans can actually go to some matches within reasonable distance. Now, if only the league were to wisely move Kansas City to St. Click to continue reading...

"Pull me out of the aircrash, Pull me out of the lake, 'cause i'm your superhero, we are standing on the edge. The head of state has called for me by name but I don't have time for him. It's gonna be a glorious day! I feel my luck could change." -- Radiohead, "Lucky" The question posed by wonky-eyed Thom Yorke & Co. Click to continue reading...

Ugh. Before I start taking bows for guessing, stress guessing the correct scoreline in the Manchester United/Liverpool game and noting that William Gallas might score for Arsenal against Chelsea, let's examine an astounding 1-7 performance from the Saturday Premier League Picks. One and seven. Egads. Click to continue reading...

"Sloppy joe, sloppy, sloppy joe." -- Adam Sandler. Tried to find a way to incorporate 'Crazy Pickle Arm' into the lead, but alas, I failed. Honestly, it wasn't worth busting my hump for Sandler, considering he hasn't made a good movie (relative term) in over a decade. Question, do they have Sloppy Joes in England, or other parts of the world or are they confined to our delicious and Click to continue reading...