PR disasters

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July 31, 2008

Debacle! Red Bull Park Construction Hits Another Snag

1
From today's Kearny Journal:

"While construction of a new Major League Soccer stadium and adjoining parking garage have halted due to an ongoing eminent domain case winding its way through the court system, the Red Bulls franchise is still seeking final approval for steel construction to begin at the site. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 03:16 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail (Links: 1 in)
Tags: , Major League Soccer, New York Red Bulls, PR disasters, Red Bull New York, SSS, soccer stadium

July 22, 2008

Chinaglia On The Lam in America

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The video below is a special dedication to former NY Cosmos star Giorgio Chinaglia, who is currently a fugitive from justice. I imagine that this song is just blasting on repeat right now as he chain smokes his way around America, although I suspect he is still in Baltimore, eating his (substantial) weight in crab cakes. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 05:20 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , Geriatrics, PR disasters

This Just In: Postponed DC-Houston Match Postponed

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Reason number 213 that DC United needs to get the hell out of RFK. What a sad joke. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , DC United, PR disasters

July 16, 2008

Logan's Revenge Back With a, Erm, Vengence

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The most unexpected thing to happen while I was on holiday last week was not Blanco's freak out, nor was it Sepp Blatter's slavery comments, or the Superliga share-cropping revelation. It was the long overdue return of Not Doug Logan. Before there was MLS Underground and The Blog Who Shall Not Be Linked to, there was Logan's Revenge spilling beans and dropping scoop all over a Blogspot page. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Chivas USA, Home Depot Center, PR disasters, Relocation, blogs, cue, home game, slavery, ticket sales

June 5, 2008

CNN Thinks That Jozy is Only Worth 3 Gallons of Gas

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Please ignore Lou Dobbs and the political blah blah blah coming out of his mouth and keep your eyes on the ticker at the bottom of the clip. My eyes bugged out when I saw that Jozy's move was deemed CNN-worthy. But then I was brought back down to MLS-ignorant earth when I noticed that the league "had agreed to a record $10 transfer fee". Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Freak Shows, Jozy Altidore, PR disasters

May 30, 2008

Adrian Serioux is Probably Not Good With Secrets

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I have no criminal background or record to speak of aside from a written warning I received from a Denton, TX cop when I got caught drinking my 1st beer the day before my 21st birthday (I was born a suspect). Therefore it is probably not my place to give FC Dallas defender and Beckham-hater Adrian Serioux advice on how to be a better thug. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 07:18 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , FC Dallas, Freak Shows, PR disasters

May 18, 2008

Wanted: Problem Solver

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If you can figure out this puzzle, please phone Kevin Payne about an exciting employment oppurtunity that may be available to you. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 08:58 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , DC United, Freak Shows, PR disasters

May 15, 2008

Is There a Nike Spy at Adidas?

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My good buddy Witz saw this over at UniWatch. How the hell did that 'swoosh' get in there? Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 02:45 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , Adidas, Columbus Crew, NIKE, PR disasters

May 6, 2008

Hoops Star in Assault Rap: Were Streamers Involved?

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NBA star Richard Jefferson has been charged with assault. No word yet as to whether or not his victim provoked the attack by throwing streamers at him. But if so Michael Wilbon feels the attack was justified. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 04:42 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , PR disasters, basketball

April 29, 2008

Old Ronaldo Takes Up Playing "The Crying Game"

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Not to get all Project Runway on y'all but this right here is a hot mess of trannie fierceness. You will be reading about this all day. Normally I'd try to stay away from something that everyone will be posting about but this is just too good to ignore. I'm sure that the underserved trannie soccer moms and non-trannie bloggers of the world will really sympathize with this story. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Freak Shows, PR disasters

April 17, 2008

Revs Defender Arrested, Ejected From Fenway Park

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What's the best way to become the most hated player on the Revolution? How about being a guy from New York and getting ejected from Fenway Park for being an all-around douche bag in a Yankees jersey to those around you? That should do it...and it is exactly what Revs defender Gary Flood, who was arrested by Boston Police, did last night with the help of his good buddy Drinky Joe Franchino. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , New England Revolution, PR disasters, Red Bull New York

April 16, 2008

Photo of the Day: Becks Checks Out Ms. New Booty

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So today there was this thing that came out in ESPN The Magazine on how Beckham is well on his way to usurping Jack Nicholson as the Lakers number one celebrity glory-seeker. But this photo (courtesy of TMZ) from last nights game versus Sacramento has to make you wonder; is he there for the game or the superb view that only court side seats can obtain? Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Brand Beckham, Flesh, PR disasters

March 25, 2008

Twellman Makes Faces, Relives Past Failures on ESPN

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It's gotta be hard to be TT. He leaves the cozy confines of a New England winter to come down to NYC to do a load of media for MLS and what happens? Some anchor on ESPN has to remind him of everything that has ever gone wrong in his life. If he wasn't on TV with his collar popped like some fratdaddy who calls everyone "chief", I would actually feel sorry for him. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , ESPN, PR disasters, Taylor Twellman

March 18, 2008

Still No Definitive Answers on Babayaro's Departure

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I know firsthand that when it comes to needing MLS-related content that you have to sometimes scrape the bottom of the peanut butter jar. But this incomplete thought of an article is really bad form on Goal.com's part. Why make your headline a question that you don't answer?

Mind you I don't know the answer but I did hear that it may (and I stress may) have been related to an Afroman-like affliction that many pro athletes suffer from. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Geriatrics, LA Galaxy, PR disasters

March 13, 2008

2 More Cubans Say "Screw it, Why Not?", Defect in Florida

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TOR tip #7: when foreign nationals defect, don't ever say the following in the paper unless you want to be suspected as the driver of the getaway car.

''I watched their game against the U.S. on TV, and I thought the Cuban team played very well,'' Muzzi said. ``We were kind of scouting that game because anytime a Cuban team comes to the United States, there's a chance someone might defect. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , PR disasters, USL

RSL Want to Be Just Like DC When They Grow Up

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There are some people say imitation is the best form of flattery. Some people think those people are wrong (and little full of themselves). And then other people just think it's plain ol' bitin'.

I don't know what category this one falls under, but RSL just launched it's own blog called "Behind the Shield". Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , DC United, PR disasters, RSL, blogs

March 12, 2008

NSR: The Govenor's Hooker is Hot!

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Not to get all Huffington Post on you but this is the woman Elliot Spitzer was paying for sex. I certainly don't condone it but I thought you might want to see what $4300-for-2-hours tail looks like. If you like what you see, holler at her on Myspace.

http://www.myspace.com/ninavenetta Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 09:23 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , Flesh, Freak Shows, PR disasters

Totally Not Shocking News: 5 Cuban Players Defect

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The second Florida was announced as the site for Cuba's 3 Olympic qualifiers you just knew this was inevitable. Man, communist body guards assigned to anti-defection duty have really fallen off since the Russians gave up the cause.

If anyone is really looking for them, try checking Maykel Galindo's couch. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , PR disasters

Not-Nicolas Cage Pulls Off Italian Job at Real Madrid

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I love soccer. I love pranks. I love this. But if it was me that the guy came to see though, I would force him prove his identity by playing the Leaving Las Vegas drinking game with me. What's the Leaving Las Vegas game? You watch the movie and take a drink every time Cage's character does. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 12:28 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail (Links: 1 in)
Tags: , Celebrity Glory-Seekers, PR disasters, Real Madrid, Videos

March 4, 2008

USL News: As The Rhino Turns...

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The picture is poetry. See the car (obviously) is NBT Bank, holder of the jungle full of loans owed by the Rochester Rhinos, who are cunningly depicted here by an actual rhino. While the beast lies on the brink of an undeserved death on USL Highway 1, the machine -while damaged- will continue on after parting with a few dollars. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , PR disasters, USL

So While You're at it Claudio, Why Don't You Tell Us About The Mexicans and Carlos Ruiz?

20


On one hand, this kind of talk is appalling. On the other hand, I kinda like WWII. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Claudio Reyna, PR disasters

January 30, 2008

Potential Blackburn Buyer IDed as Rochester Saviour

1


The Rochester mystery investor mentioned yesterday has come forward. He is a 31 year-old New Jersey-based Britain by the name of Dan Williams and he's as serious as a heart attack about investing a chunk of his cash into soccer, most likely in the Rhinos.

In an informative interview published in the Rochester Democrat & Herald, Williams says that "if we were to go ahead and say Rochester will be our first choice of investment in U. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 02:29 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , PR disasters, USL

January 29, 2008

To Catch a Predator: Soccer Edition

1


The following is an actual song from the terrace's. Never thought -and certainly don't wish- it could actually be applied to anyone in the game but sadly life is full of disappointment.

There's only ooooone Jo Okoh
There's only ooooone Jo Okoh
With a packet of sweets
and a cheeky little smile
Okoh is a f___ing pedophile Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , PR disasters

City of Rochester Talking PAETEC Park Takeover

1


Back when house music was the end-all be-all for me there was a really ill record out of Chicago called "Shit Done Changed". The dudes behind it were called Children of Divorce and just thinking of the twisted absurdity of the name still makes me cracks me up. The Rochester Raging Rhinos is a name that I've also found absurd but whatever, you get used to things. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , PR disasters, SSS, USL

January 28, 2008

A Photo Funny from Salt Lake City

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If you could see me right now I am laughing and banging my fist against the desk hysterically. Take a very close look at the image above. It's from a gallery of RSL stadium construction photos on MLSnet. All I can say is that the guy in the orange shirt is doing none of his neighbors any favors in the shedding of stereotypes department; you couldn't make this up if you tried. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Freak Shows, PR disasters, Real Salt Lake

January 17, 2008

Cristiano Ronaldo Likes Whoring as Much as Scoring

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I read the tabloids and I love them. I read Perez Hilton and I love him (in a platonic way). I DVR The Soup and I love it. I am a cheap, tawdry son of a bitch and I make no apologies for it. It is with this affinity for sleaze, depravity, and celebrity in mind that I ask the following topic question:

Why do rich, famous good-looking dudes get with pros when they already have immaculately groomed, improbably gorgeous women at home? Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Flesh, Freak Shows, PR disasters

January 11, 2008

Rumored Seattle Expansion Team Name is...

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The every excellent Kenn Tomasch says the following:

"I've heard what is supposedly the final, decided-upon name for Seattle's new MLS expansion team that begins play in 2009. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Expansion, PR disasters, Seattle

January 9, 2008

Maccabi White House FC

2


Not to get all politico today, and not to get into the tangled web of Mideast politics but shouldn't he be the last guy posing with this jersey? Just saying. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 01:32 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail (Links: 1 in)
Tags: , PR disasters

December 19, 2007

Why Sports Illustrated Got It So Wrong on the Veron Story

0


So last Friday SI.com jumped the gun in it's attempt to be the first kid on the block to report that the Veron to D.C. deal was done & dusted. Like many of you I was wondering how a known qauntity like SI could make such a rookie move. After doing a little digging, it seems more like it was SI writer Arash Markazi who jumped the gun on the story. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , I Have No Idea How to Tag This, PR disasters

December 12, 2007

And Speaking of Soccer Sex Tapes....

19


Aston Villa and England youngster Ashley Young decided it was a good idea to beat off on camera for some slapper he met on the internet. No wonder they lost to Russia if fuckers are spending the wee hours before crucial ties experimenting with their bodies (and a high-speed webcam) until all hours. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Flesh, Freak Shows, PR disasters

November 28, 2007

Red Bull Park Construction Starts Next Week. Wait, Come Back!

5


Being jaded is a horrible thing. As a Southerner living in the Northeast it is a trait that I am slowly and unfortunately beginning to intimately understand. And it's mostly due to the perennially dangling carrot that is Red Bull Park.

But if this news story is to be believed then dreams can come true and my experiment in negativity can come to close soon; The Star-Ledger says that construction will begin in earnest next week. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 05:02 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , PR disasters, Red Bull New York, SSS

I'll Give It To Ya Straight: Landon is on a Foot Fetish Site

10


So you're getting a Landon Donovan 'twofer' today and this second part will definitely be memorable. Whether that is a good thing or not is highly dependent on whether or not you are into feet. I mean really into feet.

Me, I HATE feet. Yuck. Worse than anchovies. So please don't ask me how a Google image search landed me in a website dedicated to celebrity foot fetishism but holy toe jam, what a weird find. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , Flesh, Freak Shows, LA Galaxy, PR disasters

November 27, 2007

R.I.P California Victory

4


What's sadder...this tiny gaggle of men that passed for a supporters group or the damn-near silent death of 1st year USL side California Victory? I slept on this bit of news last week as I was gearing up for a Turkey-induced coma, but thought it was still worth putting out there.

Like the Toronto Lynx, their lunch was eaten the day that MLS announced it was coming to the area. Click to continue reading...
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Tags: , PR disasters, USL

November 16, 2007

New Team But No Title Game: MLS Cup Won't Air in Seattle

1


With all the kumbaya going around about the new Seattle expansion side, how whack is it that MLS Cup won't be shown in the market? Wasn't there a bunch of talk of how Seattle was going to be this great TV market? I imagine that is only true if the games are, you know, on air. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 01:31 PM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail
Tags: , PR disasters, Seattle

November 9, 2007

The DC Front Office is Gonna Love This

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That fellow on the left is Agent Binks. That fellow on the right is DC United defender Bobby Boswell. That shirt he's holding says 'Piss on DC' and has one of those Calvin's from Calvin & Hobbs relieving himself on a United crest. Pranksters paradise or eery foreshadowing of an off season move?

This photo was snapped last night at DC's "meet the team' event; it was meant to be for season ticket holders only, but appears to have been infiltrated. Click to continue reading...
The Offside Rules @ 11:20 AM EST | Blog Profile | Post Detail (Links: 1 in)
Tags: , DC United, PR disasters
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