Vasco de Gama are in trouble. The usually pretty successful club (they've won a Brazilian championship in every decade since the '70s, and the Copa Libertadores in 1998) are currently in the bottom four of the Campeonato Brasileiro Série A, so if the season ended right now they'd be relegated to Série B. Click to continue reading...

It infuriates me when people are judged on their appearance. Just because Rafa Benitez is a tubby mess, this does not give opposing supporters the right to abuse him. The Aston Villa supporters went well over the top with their ‘Fat Spanish Waiter' banner. Admittedly, he is carrying a few stone overweight, and he's [. Click to continue reading...

Gerry McDonnell returned from his holidays on Thursday evening drunk, overweight and sporting a god-awful beard. He missed preseason, but we have no hesitation in sticking him straight in the starting lineup for the opening weekend of the Premier League. Let's hope his 're-entry' into society goes better than Joey Barton's rehabilitation (or lack thereof). Click to continue reading...

Fat footballers are part of the modern game. Whether it's players actually letting themselves go (see: Ronaldinho recently) or players who get lumped with the overweight label because it's easy alliteration (see: "Fat" Frank Lampard). It's a phenomenon that goes all the way back to William Fatty Foulke, who really deserved the title. Click to continue reading...

At long last the Ronaldinho transfer saga has ended. Manchester City's summer long pursuit of the former World Player of the Year has ended in failure as the overweight and out of shape Brazilian signs for AC Milan.

Where does this leave City? It leaves them with plenty of time to focus on their next target: Tal Ben-Haim. Click to continue reading...

Word recently was that the great once great Ronaldinho was keen to go to Beijing as one of the all-important over-age players in Brazil's Olympic soccer squad. Apparently Ronaldinho's recovered from the thigh problem that kept him out of the Barcelona team for the latter part of 2007/8. Unfortunately Ronaldinho seems to have forgotten that "thigh [. Click to continue reading...

Esteemed Readership,

I have failed you the past fortnight. Instead of delivering the regular articles, features, and random thoughts ready for semi-daily chastisement (sp?), I have been remiss in updating this little blog o' mine. Surely, your soccer landscape has become like desert as a result. Click to continue reading...