Firstly, thanks to the boys over at Unprofessional Foul for the tip-off on this one, as the mystery as to what Benjani Mwaruwaru has been up to since leaving Portsmouth gets cleared up a touch. You see, rather than get bogged down in the routine of playing football, he's decided instead to cook up a nice little sex scandal, by coupling with the Zimbabwe Head of Soccer. Click to continue reading...

Apologies to anyone who's actually proud to be Nigerian, but that country just sounds like literally the worst place on earth. The latest saga that has come to the press' attention is the kidnapping of Everton defender Joseph Yobo's brother, seized on Saturday from a hotel in Port Harcourt.

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Craig Bellamy is not a particularly nice man. In the last six years, he has hit team-mates with steel chairs and golf clubs, been acquitted of racially abusing a night club bouncer, and even been cleared of assaulting women in two separate incidents. This small melting-pot of Welsh rage now faces his latest shame having being accused of attacking a charity worker in Africa this past weekend.

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Thankfully not burdened by the inconvenience of the ongoing European Championships, the England national team are free to indulge in their favourite passtimes. As such, Wayne Rooney is off in Ibiza smoking and drinking, Joey Barton is in jail, D. Beck is getting his face tattooed, and good old Rio Ferdinand is dressing up in ridiculous clothes while people he doesn't know tell him he's great. Click to continue reading...

As we reported a little while ago, most league matches in Africa are fixed in one way or another. Some say it adds an interesting extra dimension to domestic competition, while others suggest that it maybe devalues a team's achievement when they win things based on their organized crime/government monetary backing. Click to continue reading...

Now that the metaphorical (and possibly literal) dust has settled on this year's African Cup of Nations, how did we all feel it went? Well, despite some pre-tournament cynicism from certain members of the STT editorial staff that it would just be three weeks of enormous guys built like boxers running around as fast as they could for 90 minutes until either side got a penalty, the 2008 spectacle in Ghana was nothing short of the most entertaining to date. Click to continue reading...

So, the African Cup of Nations has its finalists. The championship game will take place in sunny Accra on Sunday will be played between the Pharaohs of Egypt and the Indomitable Lions of Cameroon. Sadly, the Black Starts of Ghana and the mighty Elephants of the Ivory Coast have fallen by the wayside. Click to continue reading...

Benin coach Reinhard Fabisch was approached by a gentleman before Benin's game against Mali on Wednesday, who asked if he could fix the match. Benin ulitmately lost the game 1-0 to a Fredi Kanoute penalty. Fabisch claims that he gave this chap pretty short shrift, telling him:

'Look, you have two minutes to leave the hotel or I will call the police'

Remembering that the Ghanaian police's response time is under 24 hours, this chap promptly scarpered. Click to continue reading...

STT has been slightly skeptical about the African Cup of Nations, viewing it with the suspicion reserved for American lager and supermarket brand baked beans. It is very different to European league football, as players are encouraged to shoot the second they get in the opposition half, but before they get anywhere near the 18 yard box. Click to continue reading...

With the move of Lassana Diarra to Portsmouth fresh in everyone's mind, STT has decided to walk you through the current quagmire that is the Diarras. Now Alou, Lassana and Mahamadou are all of Malian descent but only Mahamadou has retained this Africa nationality, as the other two were both actually born in France so have featured for the French national side over the last few years. Click to continue reading...

With the move of Lassana Diarra to Portsmouth fresh in everyone's mind, STT has decided to walk you through the current quagmire that is the Diarras. Now Alou, Lassana and Mahamadou are all of Malian descent but only Mahamadou has retained this Africa nationality, as the other two were both actually born in France so have featured for the French national side over the last few years. Click to continue reading...

Has it really been two years already? Wow, count me excited. Why you might ask. Well it's because Africa's finest are currently comandeering planes and stealing boats throughout Europe as we speak in preparation for the biggest showcase of African football since the 2006 tournament, won by five time champions Eygpt. Click to continue reading...

Has it really been two years already? Wow, count me excited. Why you might ask. Well it's because Africa's finest are currently comandeering planes and stealing boats throughout Europe as we speak in preparation for the biggest showcase of African football since the 2006 tournament, won by five time champions Eygpt. Click to continue reading...

Players from African nations have been playing in the highest leagues in europe for some decades now, but the recent influx has been a great benefit to The Premiership, especially in terms of goal celebrations. Lomano Tresor Lualua and Obafemi Martins are the names that spring to mind. However, all these flips and whatnot pale in comparison to a goalkeeper vibrating along on his arse:

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If you thought unbelievably shameless corruption and match-fixing was the only reason to watch African football, think again. Chances are that if you're lucky you might even get to join in an actual riot!

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African football is still in a severe state of shock a week after the worst match-fixing attempt ever has been exposed, earning Cameroonian side Bamboutos F.C. a double relegation. Authorities were tipped off to this audacious attempt to circumvent the sanctity of Cameroon Football Federation (a.k.a. ‘Fecafoot') laws after their captain Koss Roger actually handed an envelope containing money to opposition Federal F. Click to continue reading...